What will people say?

Choices. Every day you must choose: from basic things (food,clothes ,etc) to major decisions. Sometimes is easy, sometimes is not. There are times when a choice can forever affect your life. Especially those made to please the others.

I.personally made some bad choices throughout my life.I had moments when I wanted to give up on everything :including my life.Then I realised that the only one who can change anything is me. Sometimes it seems we only have two choices:to choose the easy way or to give up. No efforts, no middle way,nothing. This giving up thing and the easy way are only results of our low self-confidence. We don’t trust ourselves. And most of the time, I hear “what will people say if I do that/love that person?” For 20 years, I lived with this . Gave up on people I loved and on my dreams because the ones around me were controlling my life and decided for me. Up to a point.

We must wake up and understand that we only have one life. The world is not taking care of us, be with us when we feel alone. It’s in our power to draw the lines of our life the way we want. Our parents lived their life the way they wanted. Times are changing. We are changing.Stand up for yourself and live the life you always dreamed of. Let the people talk, they will never shut up. But your own happiness and your true love is a one-way only ticket. If you lose it, it won’t come back.

So what do you choose? Live with the world? Care about what will they say? Or be happy?

8e2a7320280ac7d5a0b0374811bbae44

How being bullied can completely change your life. Part 2.

It was 2010. The year when everything changed. There was a new English teacher coming to the class. S liked her since the first time she entered the room and the feeling was mutual. During one of the lectures, one of the boys verbally attacked S again. And it was for the first when someone defended her. The teacher stood up for S and told the guy to leave the room. S finally felt protected and thought that maybe if she will tell her teacher about what was going on, she may be able to give S an advice or help her. That discussion took place and not only that it helped S to be more confident about herself but also helped her open with her parents. It was one month left until S was becoming an adult. She was turning 18. But compared to her colleagues, she didn’t want any party, she just wanted a small reunion with her family. However, her parents decided to take her on a surprise holiday in Turkey. 2 weeks to spend with her parents and discover Turkey.

During the time in Turkey, S finally decided to open up and explain the situation to her parents. Everything. Step by step. My parents wanted to take me out of that class and move me to another one. But I had only one year left so in the end, I stayed in that class. But the things changed. At the beginning of the last year in high school , S changed completely. After 18 years, her parents decided to buy her a dog. It was the best present ever. That dog mentally helped S more than anything . The little friend gave S so much confidence and puppy love that she couldn’t have asked for more. S started to get out, go for walks, meet new dog owners and so on.

And the things were getting even better. One night, during dinner time, her father asked her if she would want to go and study at the university abroad. It was the moment when her life changed forever. She started to apply for uni, got accepted at 3 and pushed herself for 1 year to be sure she will have the chance to change her life. There were voices saying she won’t be able to do it, but she proved everyone wrong. She didn’t help her colleagues anymore, focused on herself and didn’t let anyone, anymore  put her down. It was her moment. And she made it. She forgot about the suicide thoughts but she is still having sometimes small panic attacks and anxiety.

As I previously said, this is a true story. And I wanted to share it with you to make you understand that there is always a way. Don’t feel ashamed to ask for help. You are not alone. Don’t let anyone make you feel worthless. Just stand up and show your true value. Suicide is NOT a solution. Don’t give up on your dreams and life just because some assholes don’t have anything better to do than making fun of yourself.  You can do it!

anti-bullying-quotes-01

How being bullied can completely change your life. Is suicide a solution? (part 1 of 2)

Hi. This is a true story of a girl . Let’s call her S. She was one of many in this world who was bullied. Who had to fight with everything she had and don’t give up. According to the official figures, at least 50% of children are being bullied at least once per month. And it keeps increasing…

The first part of this post will show her story and how everything started. How she ended up being depressed and thinking of the worst. The next post will be about how she fought against the bullies and how asking for help at the right moment can save your life.

It all started at the beginning of the high school. A new phase of life, new colleagues, new chapter. Little she knew it was the start of the worst nightmare. The first few months went well , getting used to the new teachers and courses , trying to make friends and understand how the high school system worked. She had one of the most amazing tutors someone can ask for who kept the class as a family. Until one day…. when the tutor came to say she got pregnant and she had to leave them. The new one came and everything was lost. She started to make differences between them and didn’t know how to solve conflicts. It was unbelievable how the class was changing and becoming more aggressive. S. was having a problem. She was fat. Not because she was eating like a pig but due to some health problems. The time was passing by and the boys started to bully her really bad, One of the guys posted a picture of a cow online and tagged her. That thing destroyed S. She was only 15 when this happened. 😦 She decided to speak to her colleagues and explain the situation but it got even worse. Name calling, teasing, spreading rumors and offending by all means. This is what S. had to deal with. Because she was one of the smartest girls in the class, her colleagues were asking  for help. So she thought that by giving the homework and helping them, will stop the bullying and make them being more friendly. Nope. It didn’t work.

She started to  refuse to go to the sports lessons to don’t hear rude comments anymore, didn’t want to go out with her friends and do the things she enjoyed.S was feeling worthless, ugly, ashamed…she saw herself as a monster. After trying to speak to her tutor and ask for a solution,S. realised that no one will move a finger for her. Her parents were trying to find out what was going on with her, but the only thing they were receiving was a closed door. And silence. For 3 years, this nightmare continued. Being an introvert teenager with no way to escape from the high school situation took her to the point when she thought about suicide.

This was the end… S. felt too ashamed to ask for help or explain the situation to her parents or trust people anymore. Was suicide the only solution to stop the bullying? She loved her family and had dreams…but this nightmare was affecting everything. Until one day.(part 2 soon)

images