When a stranger gives you the best lesson.

“I worked in the hospitality industry for three years. And this gave me the chance to meet some great people with whom I am still friends today. One of them is my ex operations manager. The person who tried to change my life while I was working with him, but I refused and learned the lessons he was trying to give me the hard way.

I was a very arrogant but at the same time depressed girl. The type who wants to change the world, but not today. I wasn’t saw anything positive, always complaining about everything. And in the end, after several times of threatening of living, I finally did. But before that, my ex-manager wanted to give me another chance and had a soul-to-soul discussion about being more positive and open to opportunities. I heard what he had to say, but didn’t pay too much attention to put it into practice.

I went back home, ended up unemployed and in the wrongest relationship of my life. The result? A depression that almost drove me to suicide, more toxic people, and a complete lack of sense in my life. And then is when I remembered that discussion, and realized that the problem was no one but myself. My life, my decisions, my results.

So I started to read personal development books, meditate, did courses and met new people and made new friends. And then came the biggest test: a new relationship. I’ve met someone amazing on the internet and thought he was the one…but after a month I found out that he was in a 6 years long-distance relationship. And then is when I understood that I was finally healed from the past and stronger than I thought. I left him but compared to my previous relationship, this time I knew how to deal with the situation and show more love and respect for myself.

And the most beautiful thing this taught me is that I am ENOUGH. It’s fantastic to have people who truly care and love you, but if you are not OK with yourself, you will never be happy. So cherish yourself more than anything else”

Hello everybody! This is an email that I received from a girl who wants to tell you her story. About how in life, you should receive the help and support at the right time and not wait until you are on the edge of life.

“I worked in the hospitality industry for three years. And this gave me the chance to meet some great people with whom I am still friends today. One of them is my ex operations manager. The person who tried to change my life while I was working with him, but I refused and learned the lessons he was trying to give me the hard way.

I was a very arrogant but at the same time depressed girl. The type who wants to change the world, but not today. I wasn’t saw anything positive, always complaining about everything. And in the end, after several times of threatening of living, I finally did. But before that, my ex-manager wanted to give me another chance and had a soul-to-soul discussion about being more positive and open to opportunities. I heard what he had to say, but didn’t pay too much attention to put it into practice.

I went back home, ended up unemployed and in the wrongest relationship of my life. The result? A depression that almost drove me to suicide, more toxic people, and a complete lack of sense in my life. And then is when I remembered that discussion, and realized that the problem was no one but myself. My life, my decisions, my results.

So I started to read personal development books, meditate, did courses and met new people and made new friends. And then came the biggest test: a new relationship. I’ve met someone amazing on the internet and thought he was the one…but after a month I found out that he was in a 6 years long-distance relationship. And then is when I understood that I was finally healed from the past and stronger than I thought. I left him but compared to my previous relationship, this time I knew how to deal with the situation and show more love and respect for myself.

And the most beautiful thing this taught me is that I am ENOUGH. It’s fantastic to have people who truly care and love you, but if you are not OK with yourself, you will never be happy. So cherish yourself more than anything else”

A toxic relationship:the worst nightmare.

Hello everybody! For the past few days, I had this topic in mind, trying to decide if I should write about it or not. And here we are.

This post is a true story that I hope will help others who are in the same situation. There comes a moment in your life when you fall in love with the wrongest person. You know, that type of relationship who takes everything and sometimes, everyone from you, but gives nothing instead. The relationship that makes you feel worthless, incomplete, and a total wreck.

Well, the wounds left after you break up with your toxic partner are extremely hard to heal. The mental and physical pain is so hard to deal with. It feels like you have no life left inside and have no clue how to go back to your life, the one before this nightmare.

And when you think that you healed and ready to move on, someone appears in your life. A handsome, well-educated, and sexy as hell man. The type of guy with whom you speak until 3 am and feel like it’s been a 30 minutes discussion and not 5 hours one. And he sees through you, your rawest side, the one completely naked (and not talking about clothes). And at that moment, the triggers start: The comparison with the toxic ex begins, bringing back memories and wounds that you project onto the new guy. And you start to question every little thing he says or does. You want him, but at the same time, you are scared as hell.

And then one night, he disappears without saying anything. And then the worst scenario comes to your mind: you have been ghosted again. He abandoned you too. And your anxiety, overthinking, and everything else hits again. Stronger than ever. Because you realize that you had a chance with a great guy and you lost it. But he comes back. Just had an emergency….. And then is the moment when you realize that you fell for him. But what do you do when the fear of the past, still plays you? Do you fight to open up and gain a chance to be happy? Or do you lose the guy, give in to the ghost of the past and live a miserable life?

Maybe life gives you a real chance to happiness or another lesson. No one knows but as Eminem’s song says :
“Look
If you had
One shot
Or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?”

The decision belongs to each one of us. Let’s just make it the right way. Love you all and thanks for being part of Yanny’s Journey.

An Easter to remember.

Hello everyone! I hope you and your families are all fine. Happy Easter!!Today is the third day of Orthodox Easter. And this is the topic for today. How this Easter (not only the orthodox but also the catholic one) was more special than in the past years.

We are going through a dark period. A period of uncertainty, mixed feelings, far from the ones we love and apparently with no brighter future. Apparently. I can definitely say that this Easter was one of the biggest life lessons someone could ever give us.

As much as I hate to say it, this virus also has something good. Brings people back together. And no, I am not talking about exes 🙂 I am talking about people that we always said we wanted to contact them but never got the chance, as we were way too busy, running for stupid things. Things that now are useless.

This Easter showed the human side of us. Not the material one. We didn’t have the chance to show off the last bag or dress we bought, the new mani/pedi we got or how we made our hair for a fancy party. Nope. We didn’t even get the chance to go to the church. We had to find the faith inside us. Or at least, what was left. For the first time, we had to find the light within ourselves and not get it from the church.

This Easter was a reset button for most of us. Why? Because we did or at least I hope we did understand that the biggest gift life gave us is the family. Having the opportunity to call your loved ones and hearing that they are safe and sound, is priceless. It was for the first time in 28 years when calling my grandmothers on the first day of Easter made me cry. Of sadness and happiness at the same time. It made me realize that I am more vulnerable and emotional when it comes to my family than I have ever thought. Not being able to see our friends,family and the people we love, showed once more how insignificant our life is without love. And closure. Maybe this virus and the quarantine will make all of us understand that we can have as much money we want, fancy clothes or expensive stuff. We can have EVERYTHING we want. But if we do not have our family or the people we love and care for, with us to share all of this, we are NOTHING.

Hopefully, next year, things will go back to normal and we will be together and celebrate Easter. But there will be different versions of ourselves. Better ones. Because, by then, we will learn to appreciate more the freedom and love. And live in the moment, without excuses.

Who are we really?

“Who are you?”. One of the questions that we have to deal with, every day. It’s easy to answer it just with a name, but deep inside, who are you?

Nowadays, people wear masks. To pretend to be someone else or to hide things from other people. It is in human nature to try to be better than the one next to us or possessing more things than others. But we forget the essence. Slowly, but surely, we forget ourselves. It is a pattern that each one of us hears since childhood: go to school, get a job, get married, have children and die. No one is asking us what we want. What we truly want.

I absolutely hate questions like:”Oh, you are 27 and still not married?”, “When will you get pregnant?”. Why is this your problem?? The society nowadays is so focused on labels and fake conclusions that is unbelievable. It’s not ok to be fat, slim, divorced, gay, single, unemployed, or God knows what else. Don’t judge before knowing the person. You don’t know what is on her plate.

I see girls in 20s, with no dreams at all, only wanting to marry rich guys so they can make fun of their poorer friends…….. Or women staying in toxic relationships just because of what would people say. And men who believe that they are in the Middle Ages and treat women like slaves. Ummmmm….times changes.

We are stuck in a generation where loyalty is just a word, love is slowly disappearing and lying is the new truth. Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying that everyone is the same. But it is a pity the fact that in our run for money, power and reputation, we forget the humanity.

Let’s do an exercise. Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself ” Who are you?” . And try to give the most honest answer. Is the one that you are looking at, a person or a human? I wish you all a weekend full of love, peace and positive energy. And let’s make this world a better place 🙂

How can being gay be changed by religion??

Since I was a child I have been thought by people around me that being gay/lesbian is a disease. I was 19 when I first met one. And it was “love at first sight”. He is still one of my best friends and is the one who changed my mind completely. Throughout the time, due to university and work, had the chance to create a group of LGBT people. And although I am straight, I loved going to their parties and parades with my friends.

Last night I was with one of them, shopping. While we were in the queue to pay, there was a foreign old couple behind us who suddenly approached my friend. They were very religious and started to be very rude to him , by telling him that he is an error of  nature and I should pray for his soul to come back to normality. They kept telling us that in their country, he would be killed for being gay and he should seek religious and mental help.

Now my question is: how on earth can religion change a gay/lesbian orientation?? It would be like if I’m praying God to make lesbian and tomorrow when I will wake up, I will be one??? This is pure b******t. I know people who took their lives for not being accepted in their family or friends circle when they came out.

People should understand that being gay is not a choice. Is not like a pair of shoes that you choose to wear. It’s something that you are born with. I have an acquaintance who was married for 10 years and had children because his family obliged him. When his parents died, he married a guy. And he is extremely happy, as he always knew he is gay. And his wife had a double life while trying to cover him.

If you believe that whoever you are praying to, will change your child’s orientation, you have no brain. We should be more open-mind and accept love in all its forms. Why it should bother me that the guy or the girl next to me has a different orientation. It’s his/her life.

The worst thing that the “lady” told my boy last night was “being gay will also make you look for small children attention. You will become a pedophile too.” This broke his heart. He is a teaching assistant. And is doing an amazing job. The kids really love him. But what has to do being a gay with a pedophile?? There are a lot of straight pedophiles too. Are they better just because they are straight??

We should pay more attention to what are we talking about. And if we are not sure about something, just shut the hell up. One thing is to be religious and the other is to make others be an idiot and selfish as you. I am religious in my way but I am also mature enough to understand that the world is changing and we love more the one next to us.

So I am still asking myself: how religion can change sexual orientation?

Why do we play with feelings?

Yesterday I was with some friends celebrating a name anniversary.And we started to talk about relationships. One of the girls had a similar experience, with the difference that her guy never ever try to maintain contact with her. My ex called me first thing at midnight on New Year’s night. Acting like nothing happened. He continued to check all my Whatsapp statuses and liking everything I post on social media. Furthermore, he was one of the first people to contact me when he found out about the death of my friend.

What is it going on with him? Dumping me for his ex but being only with his friends on New Year’s party and sending me messages? I tried to answer only basic things but I wanted to ask him soo many things. It’s been more than 2 weeks but I still miss him. However,I chose to continue with no-contact strategy.

Why do we prefer to play with other’s feelings? Due to confusion? Preferring someone that we already know but running after others? Is it helping our ego to know that there are more people wanting us? In this case, he definitely doesn’t know what he wants. Or maybe he does but he is playing. It’s really stupid doing this especially to people that are really nice and don’t deserve this at all. My grandfather told me when I was a kid that the most important in a relationship is to treat your partner as you want to be treated. Love and give. Don’t expect the moon from him but from your part give everything.

But what happens when you give everything and not receive the same? Is it enough for a person to love and care for 2? Is it fair for someone to don’t receive everything from his/her partner just because they are a couple?

We all deserve to love and be loved. To be cared for and appreciated. I have learned that I am just losing my time waiting for someone who will never give me 100%. There are 7+ billion people in this world. Our soul-mate is definitely somewhere. Be patient and hope. And love those who really matter.

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How being bullied can completely change your life. Part 2.

It was 2010. The year when everything changed. There was a new English teacher coming to the class. S liked her since the first time she entered the room and the feeling was mutual. During one of the lectures, one of the boys verbally attacked S again. And it was for the first when someone defended her. The teacher stood up for S and told the guy to leave the room. S finally felt protected and thought that maybe if she will tell her teacher about what was going on, she may be able to give S an advice or help her. That discussion took place and not only that it helped S to be more confident about herself but also helped her open with her parents. It was one month left until S was becoming an adult. She was turning 18. But compared to her colleagues, she didn’t want any party, she just wanted a small reunion with her family. However, her parents decided to take her on a surprise holiday in Turkey. 2 weeks to spend with her parents and discover Turkey.

During the time in Turkey, S finally decided to open up and explain the situation to her parents. Everything. Step by step. My parents wanted to take me out of that class and move me to another one. But I had only one year left so in the end, I stayed in that class. But the things changed. At the beginning of the last year in high school , S changed completely. After 18 years, her parents decided to buy her a dog. It was the best present ever. That dog mentally helped S more than anything . The little friend gave S so much confidence and puppy love that she couldn’t have asked for more. S started to get out, go for walks, meet new dog owners and so on.

And the things were getting even better. One night, during dinner time, her father asked her if she would want to go and study at the university abroad. It was the moment when her life changed forever. She started to apply for uni, got accepted at 3 and pushed herself for 1 year to be sure she will have the chance to change her life. There were voices saying she won’t be able to do it, but she proved everyone wrong. She didn’t help her colleagues anymore, focused on herself and didn’t let anyone, anymore  put her down. It was her moment. And she made it. She forgot about the suicide thoughts but she is still having sometimes small panic attacks and anxiety.

As I previously said, this is a true story. And I wanted to share it with you to make you understand that there is always a way. Don’t feel ashamed to ask for help. You are not alone. Don’t let anyone make you feel worthless. Just stand up and show your true value. Suicide is NOT a solution. Don’t give up on your dreams and life just because some assholes don’t have anything better to do than making fun of yourself.  You can do it!

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How being bullied can completely change your life. Is suicide a solution? (part 1 of 2)

Hi. This is a true story of a girl . Let’s call her S. She was one of many in this world who was bullied. Who had to fight with everything she had and don’t give up. According to the official figures, at least 50% of children are being bullied at least once per month. And it keeps increasing…

The first part of this post will show her story and how everything started. How she ended up being depressed and thinking of the worst. The next post will be about how she fought against the bullies and how asking for help at the right moment can save your life.

It all started at the beginning of the high school. A new phase of life, new colleagues, new chapter. Little she knew it was the start of the worst nightmare. The first few months went well , getting used to the new teachers and courses , trying to make friends and understand how the high school system worked. She had one of the most amazing tutors someone can ask for who kept the class as a family. Until one day…. when the tutor came to say she got pregnant and she had to leave them. The new one came and everything was lost. She started to make differences between them and didn’t know how to solve conflicts. It was unbelievable how the class was changing and becoming more aggressive. S. was having a problem. She was fat. Not because she was eating like a pig but due to some health problems. The time was passing by and the boys started to bully her really bad, One of the guys posted a picture of a cow online and tagged her. That thing destroyed S. She was only 15 when this happened. 😦 She decided to speak to her colleagues and explain the situation but it got even worse. Name calling, teasing, spreading rumors and offending by all means. This is what S. had to deal with. Because she was one of the smartest girls in the class, her colleagues were asking  for help. So she thought that by giving the homework and helping them, will stop the bullying and make them being more friendly. Nope. It didn’t work.

She started to  refuse to go to the sports lessons to don’t hear rude comments anymore, didn’t want to go out with her friends and do the things she enjoyed.S was feeling worthless, ugly, ashamed…she saw herself as a monster. After trying to speak to her tutor and ask for a solution,S. realised that no one will move a finger for her. Her parents were trying to find out what was going on with her, but the only thing they were receiving was a closed door. And silence. For 3 years, this nightmare continued. Being an introvert teenager with no way to escape from the high school situation took her to the point when she thought about suicide.

This was the end… S. felt too ashamed to ask for help or explain the situation to her parents or trust people anymore. Was suicide the only solution to stop the bullying? She loved her family and had dreams…but this nightmare was affecting everything. Until one day.(part 2 soon)

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Is childhood a piece of heaven?

Hello again. As I said in my first post, today will be about childhood.Being one of the most important period of our life, childhood is the main point in helping us to develop as human beings.Is the stage when you discover games, friends and learn how to take care of yourself. But what happens when you discover that childhood is not great for everyone? When you realise that not having the toy or the gadget you wanted is nothing compared to a kid who has nothing to eat or play with? This post is about this: the good and the bad of childhood.

I was born in 92 , in a small city, without having any brothers or sisters. Being the first niece of the family, I was raised as a spoiled child.  My parents and grandparents were buying me everything I wanted (based on their possibilities) and made sure I was OK all the time. I had the privilege of being part of the last generation who had real childhood, with no gadgets like tablets, Iphones or anything like that. Nope. My childhood meant going out in the morning and coming home in the night. Lots of games, excursions, and laughs. Running in the rain,climbing the trees, hiding everywhere and looking for new things to learn. Pure happiness. I was having 2 teams: one younger than me( I was the leader) and one older (I was the youngest and everyone protected me). Both teams had some of the most fantastic people I’ve met in my entire life. They were funny, caring and we were there for each other all the time. We were going in house just to eat. Afterwards back to play, discover the world and make memories. The worst part was when our parents were calling us. As during the holidays I was staying mainly with my grandparents as there were my friends,my grandfather was always threatening me that if I don’t go in , he will call my parents ( that was the sign that he had enough and I really had to go back in ). There were neighbors hating us as we were way too loud and were running everywhere and disturbing them. I remember that once, because of the old ladies complained with our parents because she couldn’t stay on the bench outside and chat with her friends due to us, the guys from the old team stole it and hanged it out on a tree.

However, as the time was passing we were starting to understand things: that life is not only pink and not everyone has the chance to be raised in a loving family. Being a spoiled kid was also a negative thing because I was starting to think that I deserved everything and everyone was supposed to take care of my needs and fulfill my requests. Up to a point. Every summer holiday I was going at least one month ( there were 3 months of summer holidays) to see my aunt and her family. She is living in a small village and working in a kindergarten. It was 2004 when I had one of the biggest wake up calls of my life and the moment when I stopped to think only of myself and make other kids feel bad because they didn’t have what I was having. One morning, my aunt told me to go and help her with the kids. She was having  kids aged between 5-6. What could have gone wrong? Everything. I entered the class and there were 7 kids already. I started to play with them. They looked dirty.. 😦 I tried to be as nice and friendly as possible and started to teach them games. When the lunch break came, I realised that there were kids with no food. Their parents didn’t give them anything to eat. I was having a pack of cookies and sandwiches made by my aunt. That moment was the first time I understood life was not fair. They were kids. I was a kid. But they were suffering and I was happy.  No clean clothes, no hygiene and no food…. Welcome to the real world. I gave them my food and saw a smile on their face. The saddest thing was that one of them asked what was that black thing in the cookies? It was chocolate… When I came back home, to my friends, I learned to appreciate everything I had at its real value, been closer to the people who weren’t as lucky as I was and gave more to those who didn’t have.

Nowadays, I see many kids addicted to gadgets with no real childhood. I don’t see kids playing outside anymore, no more laughs or jokes, no more hide & seek players or games creators. The times changed, people changed, but the question stays. Where is the childhood? Why do we choose to put the childhood in an Ipad than making lifetime memories? Where are the parents cursing around that kids are staying too much outside and the kids creating friendships?

In the end, I can say that I have been blessed to have an amazing childhood with lots of memories. What about you? Was childhood a piece of heaven for you?

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The Journey Begins

Welcome and thanks for visiting my blog!

This blog is about a journey. A journey called life. You, my visitor, will find posts related to everything life has to offer: good and bad experiences, travel stories, lessons and all the little things that make this journey beautiful. I will be more than happy to hear your stories too and learn new things.  The aim of this blog  is to underline the way people and decisions affect us by going from pure happiness to depression and vice versa , the importance of  life lessons  and how traveling can improve a person’s life. The next post will be about childhood and how this was one of the most important period of my life .So stay tuned and be part of Yanny’s journey.cropped-architar2015