Why do we play with feelings?

Yesterday I was with some friends celebrating a name anniversary.And we started to talk about relationships. One of the girls had a similar experience, with the difference that her guy never ever try to maintain contact with her. My ex called me first thing at midnight on New Year’s night. Acting like nothing happened. He continued to check all my Whatsapp statuses and liking everything I post on social media. Furthermore, he was one of the first people to contact me when he found out about the death of my friend.

What is it going on with him? Dumping me for his ex but being only with his friends on New Year’s party and sending me messages? I tried to answer only basic things but I wanted to ask him soo many things. It’s been more than 2 weeks but I still miss him. However,I chose to continue with no-contact strategy.

Why do we prefer to play with other’s feelings? Due to confusion? Preferring someone that we already know but running after others? Is it helping our ego to know that there are more people wanting us? In this case, he definitely doesn’t know what he wants. Or maybe he does but he is playing. It’s really stupid doing this especially to people that are really nice and don’t deserve this at all. My grandfather told me when I was a kid that the most important in a relationship is to treat your partner as you want to be treated. Love and give. Don’t expect the moon from him but from your part give everything.

But what happens when you give everything and not receive the same? Is it enough for a person to love and care for 2? Is it fair for someone to don’t receive everything from his/her partner just because they are a couple?

We all deserve to love and be loved. To be cared for and appreciated. I have learned that I am just losing my time waiting for someone who will never give me 100%. There are 7+ billion people in this world. Our soul-mate is definitely somewhere. Be patient and hope. And love those who really matter.

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Why do we prefer to run from everything instead of facing it?

Today is about one of the greatest lessons someone can learn and that is to stop running and take responsibility for his/her actions. Nowadays, we are so used to take a short way and run if we feel something is too much that we forget how to face the ugly when it comes and maintain the human relationships. We are getting used to this since we are kids. In order to avoid being in trouble and receiving punishment, we prefer to act as nothing happened and throw the guilt on someone else.  Then , when we become adults, we keep the same template: job mistake ? not me…. failure? not me…. relationship not working? his/her fault.Not mine. It’s never us. Instead of understanding our faults and trying to deal with them, we choose to be the victims and wait for someone else’s support.

If people would understand to communicate and be more caring towards each other, this world would be a way better place to live. In my country, there is a saying : “No matter what,always leave room for hello”. How it would be if instead of leaving a person who truly loves us because of stupid things, we would try to find a solution and trying to make the relationship work and not replacing that person immediately “just because it didn’t work”? Or if we would understand that maybe we were wrong with our friends and having the courage to sorting it? Why do we lose important people in our life because of stupid things and running from responsibilities? Is it human nature?Education? Fear of not hurting the others?

Maybe one day we will change. Or we will learn from our mistakes. But what if we lose those people for good? What if is it too late and no turning back? We should appreciate and fight for everything we have . Don’t let people who truly love and care for you go. Stay, listen and talk. Do things together. Dream and make plans. Love and be loved. Because is the most beautiful thing it can happen to you.

How being bullied can completely change your life. Part 2.

It was 2010. The year when everything changed. There was a new English teacher coming to the class. S liked her since the first time she entered the room and the feeling was mutual. During one of the lectures, one of the boys verbally attacked S again. And it was for the first when someone defended her. The teacher stood up for S and told the guy to leave the room. S finally felt protected and thought that maybe if she will tell her teacher about what was going on, she may be able to give S an advice or help her. That discussion took place and not only that it helped S to be more confident about herself but also helped her open with her parents. It was one month left until S was becoming an adult. She was turning 18. But compared to her colleagues, she didn’t want any party, she just wanted a small reunion with her family. However, her parents decided to take her on a surprise holiday in Turkey. 2 weeks to spend with her parents and discover Turkey.

During the time in Turkey, S finally decided to open up and explain the situation to her parents. Everything. Step by step. My parents wanted to take me out of that class and move me to another one. But I had only one year left so in the end, I stayed in that class. But the things changed. At the beginning of the last year in high school , S changed completely. After 18 years, her parents decided to buy her a dog. It was the best present ever. That dog mentally helped S more than anything . The little friend gave S so much confidence and puppy love that she couldn’t have asked for more. S started to get out, go for walks, meet new dog owners and so on.

And the things were getting even better. One night, during dinner time, her father asked her if she would want to go and study at the university abroad. It was the moment when her life changed forever. She started to apply for uni, got accepted at 3 and pushed herself for 1 year to be sure she will have the chance to change her life. There were voices saying she won’t be able to do it, but she proved everyone wrong. She didn’t help her colleagues anymore, focused on herself and didn’t let anyone, anymore  put her down. It was her moment. And she made it. She forgot about the suicide thoughts but she is still having sometimes small panic attacks and anxiety.

As I previously said, this is a true story. And I wanted to share it with you to make you understand that there is always a way. Don’t feel ashamed to ask for help. You are not alone. Don’t let anyone make you feel worthless. Just stand up and show your true value. Suicide is NOT a solution. Don’t give up on your dreams and life just because some assholes don’t have anything better to do than making fun of yourself.  You can do it!

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The Journey Begins

Welcome and thanks for visiting my blog!

This blog is about a journey. A journey called life. You, my visitor, will find posts related to everything life has to offer: good and bad experiences, travel stories, lessons and all the little things that make this journey beautiful. I will be more than happy to hear your stories too and learn new things.  The aim of this blog  is to underline the way people and decisions affect us by going from pure happiness to depression and vice versa , the importance of  life lessons  and how traveling can improve a person’s life. The next post will be about childhood and how this was one of the most important period of my life .So stay tuned and be part of Yanny’s journey.cropped-architar2015