Game of narcissists

Each one of us at least once in our lives had to deal with a narcissistic. In schools, high schools, uni, work, normal life, they are everywhere. And the worst is that they are becoming more, daily.

One of the traits of a narcissist is that is unable to ever see you happy. You are never allowed to have, do, receive or be happier than them. In their mind, the world should revolve around them. But they can also represent huge damage to you. They are like energetical vampires. They suck your energy, try to make you fall for them, put you down, and then disappear. Easy peasy.

I had to deal with this type of people for my entire life. Some of them tried to change me and they saw they couldn’t, they left. Others played mind games which in the end only affected them, as I am not going for that. 

Narcissists always seek attention and approval from everybody as they think they deserve the world, but give nothing in return. They can be in a relationship and still looking for other partners as they are never happy. They lack a lot of things but try to hide this by having an arrogant, selfish attitude.

But the funniest thing in dealing with someone like this is when you give a taste of their own medicine. From my personal experience, I can tell for sure, that this is getting them out of their minds. How? Very easy. Here are 5 ways:

  1. Do you: Pay attention to your needs, desires, and feelings. Most of the time, he will feel “inferior” without recognising, and he will devalue you and your projects believing that by doing this, that feeling will disappear.
  2. Be happy:. I had people with 0 achievements, pathetic, empty-headed narcissists telling me I wasn’t good enough for love, happiness, or success. I shut them down as they didn’t deserve even a word from me and continued to pursue my dreams and happiness.
  3. Take care: Ask for help if needed as narcissists can sometimes become not only mentally but also physically aggressive. Talk to family, close friends, or anyone who could help you get out from them.
  4. Expect being heart-broken but don’t show them: And believe me this kills them (100% proved). Don’t post sad pics, quotes, whatever that can make him see you’re suffering for them. They are craving this, and it will only affect you more. I was dying inside, but always shown a happy face, and this was getting on his nerves as he was realising that he has no more power over me.
  5. Let them go: It will be hard as hell. You will suffer, and be hurt and think that you will never find someone like him (this what they do to you; making you believe that they are the best you will ever found. Trust me, they are the worst). Take time to heal your wounds, regain your power and put all the pieces back together

Although dealing with a narcissist can be painful, it also means a life-changing experience if we are talking about relationships. It will only help you to get back to your roots, see your true colors, your qualities, and what you are capable of. But never settle for someone who doesn’t see your value and only wants to make you his puppet. Don’t forget that you deserve the world!

A promise made to myself

Hello beautiful people!! I hope you’re all good and enjoying Sunday. As I am still in my weekend mood, I was thinking of sharing with you something that not only changed my life but myself too…completely.

Two years ago, I was a very different person. Mentally, spiritually, in any way, you could imagine. I was the one there for everyone, at any time, without expecting anything in return. A type of person who was a people pleaser, who was leaving her worth being defined by others opinion. I was afraid of pursuing my dreams because failure would have been a disaster for my family. (not my parents, my family). My parents have always been my biggest support but as stupid as I was, I was never listening to their pieces of advice, always putting others above them. But as karma proved that it is either my best friend or my worst enemy, gave me the lesson of my life.

Before starting the blog, I was at the edge of my life. Due to a toxic decision and being influenced by people with “goodwill” that I thought was caring for me, I almost lost everything: parents, friends, even myself. The 6th of December was the night that started my positive movement. For the first time in my life, no one knew my plans, my hopes, my moves, anything. Except for my parents. And my dog:)

On the 25th of December 2018, I suffered the worst disappointment of my life. And that night, the old me died. And guess what? The people who influenced me were either accusing me or disappearing totally. The only people who were by my side were my parents and some people that I would never think of, which in the meantime became my best friends. That was the moment when I made a promise to myself. No matter how hard things will be, as long as I have myself, my parents, my dog, and true friends, I can move mountains. And I did it. In 2 years I learned and developed myself more than I did in 26. I am in the happiest place of my life, surrounded by people who care and love me. People who are sharing my values, dreams, and hopes. Who are there not only when I am good, but also when I struggle. And the most important thing, I found myself. I learned how to love myself and put my needs first. To stop letting anyone else’s opinion affecting me as long as it is not constructive.

Two years taught me two crucial things: that family is not always blood, and if you really want something, then the sky is the limit. You can do whatever you want. Just believe in yourself and the magic of new beginnings.

Wishing you all a great Sunday:)

A toxic relationship:the worst nightmare.

Hello everybody! For the past few days, I had this topic in mind, trying to decide if I should write about it or not. And here we are.

This post is a true story that I hope will help others who are in the same situation. There comes a moment in your life when you fall in love with the wrongest person. You know, that type of relationship who takes everything and sometimes, everyone from you, but gives nothing instead. The relationship that makes you feel worthless, incomplete, and a total wreck.

Well, the wounds left after you break up with your toxic partner are extremely hard to heal. The mental and physical pain is so hard to deal with. It feels like you have no life left inside and have no clue how to go back to your life, the one before this nightmare.

And when you think that you healed and ready to move on, someone appears in your life. A handsome, well-educated, and sexy as hell man. The type of guy with whom you speak until 3 am and feel like it’s been a 30 minutes discussion and not 5 hours one. And he sees through you, your rawest side, the one completely naked (and not talking about clothes). And at that moment, the triggers start: The comparison with the toxic ex begins, bringing back memories and wounds that you project onto the new guy. And you start to question every little thing he says or does. You want him, but at the same time, you are scared as hell.

And then one night, he disappears without saying anything. And then the worst scenario comes to your mind: you have been ghosted again. He abandoned you too. And your anxiety, overthinking, and everything else hits again. Stronger than ever. Because you realize that you had a chance with a great guy and you lost it. But he comes back. Just had an emergency….. And then is the moment when you realize that you fell for him. But what do you do when the fear of the past, still plays you? Do you fight to open up and gain a chance to be happy? Or do you lose the guy, give in to the ghost of the past and live a miserable life?

Maybe life gives you a real chance to happiness or another lesson. No one knows but as Eminem’s song says :
“Look
If you had
One shot
Or one opportunity
To seize everything you ever wanted
In one moment
Would you capture it
Or just let it slip?”

The decision belongs to each one of us. Let’s just make it the right way. Love you all and thanks for being part of Yanny’s Journey.

It’s the first day of the rest of your life.

Today is the day when I give up on all the negativity in my life. And leave behind all the toxic people, drama, stupid games or negative thoughts which retained me be from fighting for my dreams. Today is the first day of the rest of my life.

Even though we don’t realize or don’t want to accept it, we do have toxic people around us. You can see them everywhere: family, friends, work. But what is most important is how you deal with them.

In my opinion, there are 3 types of toxic people:

-Narcissist: Imagine that you are dating a guy who tells you he is the best, does this and that, possess things that he doesn’t and is the perfect definition of arrogance. He wants everyone to admire him, yet he doesn’t care at all about others feeling. Is a selfish and cold person who loves to blame others for his problems. EVERY TIME.

-Mr. Know it All: Imagine being with a guy who tells you what to listen, what friends to have, what to watch and how to talk…..Is the intellectual type who believes he is the best and knows everything that suits everyone.Is the one who has a solution for everything, concerning him or not.

-Drama Queens: My last ex is exactly this type. And I think is the most toxic type. Imagine dating with a guy who always has a drama.ALWAYS.And when you try to change the topic and be more positive, the call you heartless. Throughout my relationship with him, I gave up on so many people and chances just because he made me feel so worthless. I got to the point when I was feeling his bad energy and almost be caught in his drama. And then I realized something was wrong.I broke up with him yesterday. I couldn’t carry on anymore. His reaction? He started to play the victim role and cursed and offended me big time. But at least it’s over. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH. This was the last drop.

It is time to take back my life and my dreams and move on. These toxic people made me understand that I have myself. And this is the most important. From my experience, I am telling all of you who are going through the same things: Don’t stay in a toxic relationship. RUN as far as possible. Don’t let anyone put you down. You deserve better things and people who are really able to love you. And no matter what, keep fighting for your dreams. Let today be the first day of the rest of your life.